How I would have loved to be a fly on the wall in the royal room when Queen Lily met prime minister BoJo. Well not really, of course. For one, I would have a brain the size of – well – a fly’s brain, I suppose. And two, I would have been smacked by a […]
Satire
Five Minutes In The US And My English Is In Big Trouble
I didn’t spend long in the US, just past customs and a few hours between terminals, but I can tell you straight away that if I came to live there permanently, my English would quickly be in big trouble. For starters, my cute semblance of a cockneyish intonation due to my being born on the […]
You Shift If You Want To, Boris – The EU’s Not For Shifting
Boris Johnson is quickly gaining a reputation of being the most deluded and cynical prime minister ever. After having promised to build the Mancunians a Lego railway set for their troubles, he now insists that the bigwigs in Brussels change their tune by abandoning the damned Irish border so that the Brexit negotiations can be resumed […]
So What, Ambassador – Isabel Had Sex And Then Took A Leak
No one was much bothered by what had been leaked. Kim Darroch, the UK ambassador to the US, had only reported back what had long been obvious to the entire world: that Donald Trump was vain and inept and ran a wholly dysfunctional administration. It was the sort of email that anyone might send after watching […]
How An Airline Makes It Crystal Clear That I’m A Loser!
Have you noticed how when you board the bigger inter-continental aircrafts, you always have to go through the business class before you take out your reading glasses to evaluate the smallness of your economy seat that you cannot find in the first place? I have my own theory on this, a theory that is mine […]
“Brexit Illusions” – By Lewis Carroll And The Two Ronnies
I don’t know whether British citizens living in the heart of the EU should feel embarrassed, bemused, ashamed, or totally indifferent to the Brexit illusions going on in Westminster. The Brexit saga seems to be more of a cross between a Lewis Carroll fantasy and a sketch performed by the Two Ronnies, than a debate […]
Spot And Stop That Lorry: “Irish Border 2.0” (PS4 and XBox)
Although Theresa May has scarpered and Boris Johnson is ready to take over, Brexit is still with us. Brexit and the Irish border. Time to update my juvenile solution to the Irish question. There seems to be two basic problems with the thorny question of the Irish border. In the same way that […]
Have You Heard The Joke About An English PM, A French Negotiator, And An Irish Border?
No, before you ask, this is not the joke about the Englishman, Scotsman, and Irishman in a pub, where the Englishman wanted to leave, so they all had to leave. This is a joke about an English prime minister, a French negotiator, and an Irish border. All three waited nearly two years to come up […]
Brexit Musings (40) – Meet The Wallies From Westminster
I did something that I shouldn’t have. Knowing that there were a series of amendments to be voted on the Brexit deal, I watched a live stream from the House of Commons. It was only a few minutes, but time enough to not only be astonished by the anachronism of what goes on at Westminster […]
Brexit Musings (38) – Is There Anybody Who Can Deliver Brexit?
Theresa May knows – just like the rest of us – that the hard line Brexiteers within her own party, and the opposition, could not even deliver a loaf of bread to your doorstep, yet alone Brexit to the country. Oh! I do love the UK. It’s the land of my childhood, […]